C'mon SPpprrrrRING... Oh, My God!!!

Fair warning - put your seat belt on.

It’s the last day of the 2010 Olympics.  It’s a bit of a sad day.

*cough*  Maybe if you’re from Canada.

I got a layout done this morning.

( And the crowd cheers! )

“ Thank you!  Thank you!  Thank you, very much! “

“ No - really!  Thank you!  Thank you! “

“ Okay - ohhhh… - Hi there!  Thank you!  Thank you! “

“ Would ya’ shut up and sit down so I can show it to ya’! “

“ Please! “

- Journaling -
" Little did we realize... all the laughter and chaos that would fill this home when this little fart came to live with us and bring some much-needed companionship for Zucker! "

 - Kit  and Alpha Set -
So Beary Fun by Kimberly Stewart at www.scrapbook-elements.com


- Font -
Blooming Grove

What the heck would we do without humor?  Okay - that may be a dumb question.  Because - we all know somebody without a sense of humor.


;)

And - we all have witnessed people running from that demise - right?!  Yeah - there’s some of ‘em - I’m telling ya' - you just wanna take ‘em out to the closest waterhole and get ‘em drunk enough to dance on the bar!

And ya’ wanna make sure the batteries are charged in your digital camera before you put that in your purse - on your way out the door - during the kidnapping! 

If it weren’t for dry southern humor - I don’t think I would have cared enough to hang around this planet for long!  Because - let’s just face it.  There is - nothin' - funny - about Al Gore.  Maybe funny lookin'.  But if Al Gore is anything that he comes by honestly - it would be - a poor pitiful and confused - soul.

And I can go forever - before ever having to put up with changing the television channel after one more threat of discussing him - “ after this commercial.”

I dunno.  Think he was at the Olympics?  Boy -  wouldn’t that be one for the National Enquirer!  They already banked on the one about all the power he uses at his house!  All they need now is a sequel.  Big - fat - photo on the front page with him sittin’ smack in the middle of - all that power they’re using at the Olympics!

And - I ain’t talkin’ about puttin’ him in the middle of all those strong hockey players!

Or - am I ?

In case you haven't figured it out - yet ...

I'm really not going nuts.  In fact - if I'm sick at all - I'm just downright sick of winter.  And all I can do is find something that makes me laugh - like this old classic!

Of Views and Mornings - UPdated!!

(see update below)

It was so nice to glance up and see all the snow on the Great Smoky Mountains!!  I guess ya' just had to be there!

Sometimes - it really doesn’t pay to have a camera with you when you’re running around in a vehicle - especially when it’s secured in its own little case.

If this were the butt of a steer - it would be half a cheek. I got - hmmm…. No time ( at 55mph ) - to yank and wait for the camera to come on and set before getting this shot. But - I tried! At the very least - I had to try.

Ask Dwayne to go back and pull over? Right. He was worried about the dogs. They missed lunch.

Actually - they’ve had lunch since this scene took place. And then supper. Even breakfast!

Yesterday was just - weird. It was a little fun but - weird.  It was absolutely wonderful to get out of the house and go on a road trip!!  It was helpful.  It was healing.

Okay - so - it's not a road trip for all you - " drive around the corner to the grocery store " city slickers.  It is for all us " Country Bumpkins " who never see anything walking on two legs beyond all the ones that sleep under the same roof as you.

So there!  It was a road trip!  But it was - still - just - weird.

It was Tax Filing Day. We learned the hard way last year. Driving to Maryville is so worth the effort - to do business with the folks you’ve been working with over the past nine years.

For somebody who preaches - “ If it ain’t broken - don’t fix it,” - we sure fell off our chuck wagon!  But hey - We're tough.  We shake it off - and go back to livin' what we're preachin'!  And we don't cry until we're halfway in the middle of the hayfield.

We came home without stopping by the other location of Horn of Plenty - my most favorite place of all - in Maryville. Believe it or not - Dwayne managed to get me headed back to Loudon without stopping at one single Starbucks. Honestly - I was too busy with a XXX Vitamin Water by then! Gosh - I love those Blueberry-Pomegranate gushers! ( And if you test your mouse at their website enough - you'll end up bent over in pain! )

Oh - but we did get to bring one very - very - VERY important item home!

They’ll all be gone by the end of the UT VOLS Mens Basketball Team’s “ Outlive “ Game that airs today - at 12noon eastern time!!!! Go buy a T-Shirt to help fight Cancer! Go text a donation to help fight Cancer!  And feel even more wonderful today!

** UPDATE **

UT VOLS WIN !!!  74-65 !!!!   Please text donations to fight cancer at 20222 and text the word OUTLIVE until 10pm tonight (Saturday) !!

And let us also take a moment to think of the ones with that special spirit of a Fighter - those that God called upon to come on home to be with Him - after He decided that their life had already been a job well done.

UT VOLS " Outlive " Game Airing Saturday!!!

It’s impossible to watch television around this house - unless you pile the residing canine yard varmints in bed with you.

 

( look at that wing of an ear! )

But last night was a really - really - REALLY important game.  And I was not missing a moment of the fun.  I hushed the puppies up long enough to watch my beloved UT Lady VOLS clench the SEC Championship by winning their game with a score of  81 - 65 against the Kentucky Wildcats!  I’m so proud of those girls!

The UT VOLS Mens Basketball team plays No. 2 Kentucky Mens team tomorrow ( Saturday ) - beginning at 12noon eastern time - and the game will be televised.  This is a very special game - as well.  This is The “ Outlive “ game - honoring the success of former UT VOLS basketball player Chris Lofton - in his personal battle with Testicular Cancer - a couple years ago - while keeping it a secret - and continuing to play a season!

And everybody can be a part - whether they go to the game - or - watch on television!  I’m hoping and praying we’ll have fans from all across the country popping their cell phones to donate!  And I hope the sale of the “ Outlive “ T-shirts ( The design I voted on won!!! ) will soar!!  They only cost $20.00 - cheaper than the ones ya’ buy at concerts!

I’m cherishing every moment I can - still - manage to load my “ Carlie Beast “ up onto my bed so I can gain some peace and quiet.  Won’t be long before I may have to go back into weight training.  LOL  ( just kidding! )

Carlie was born November 24, 2009.  She’s now 3-months-old.

The paw of a 3-month-old Basset Hound.  Mind-blowing!

Even the Gods have difficulty fathoming such wonders!

Happy 'n Sad - like - Sweet 'n Sour

I’m doing laundry today.  Okay - so - I get to another load of darks.  I'm in the kitchen when I hear the buzzer on the dryer - which is located down stairs - in the basement.  That’s no easy feat these days - with two pooches trying to convince neighbors that we have constant mauling going on in this house.

I know.  I know.  I’ve tried telling ’em.  “ Look - you goofball poo-ploppers.  The closest neighbors are living acres away! “

Do they listen to me?  Do they believe me?  Do they care?  Huh.

Anyway - I get down there and begin hanging all the nice and clean - warm - freshly scented - unwrinkled load of dark clothing when I discover - this.

Dwayne comes down to bring me a sock that was left upstairs - because I told him that I make enough trips up and down those stairs - and he can do it once for me - before I do it a dozen more times today - before the last trip down to get something out of the freezer for supper.

Me -
“ Hey - there‘s a hole in your shirt.  Do you know anything about that? “

Him -
“ Umm - yeah.  It must’ve happened when… ”  ( He’s not even paying attention. )

Me -
“ Do you even know which shirt I’m talking about? “

Him -
“ Not really. “

Me -
“ Look.  It’s your red plaid flannel shirt.  How did that happen? “

Him -
“ I dunno.  I’m not worried about it.  It’s one of my old ones. “

Me -
“ Well - I’m worried about it.  It’s one of my favorite shirts I wear! “

Him ( laughing ) -
“ It’s my shirt! “

On a more serious note -

Today marks the 30th anniversary of the day we buried my Dad - Marty - who was technically considered to be my stepfather - but he’s the man that raised me from the time I was 16 months old.  Ironically - that date also happened to be my Mom and Dad’s wedding anniversary.  However - they’d been divorced a year or two before he was killed by a drunk driver down in Houston, Texas.

If this part seems cut and dry - it is.  It’s the best I can do - at this moment.  This friggin’ world demands life go on.  Therefore - I will carry on - while I take a few days to work - sort - and deal - before I can - finally - journal my thoughts.  I miss him - like he was here only yesterday.

That’s about all I can handle saying today.  I know one thing - I’ll be okay.  But I can't let this day go without posting a special song - for Daddy.

Run Away - to - Bliss!

I discovered these while shopping at WalMart in Lenoir City, yesterday.  It was a good thing I bought a bag.

I needed them!  I mean - I really - needed them!

If it weren’t for the fact that I’d awaken a sleeping dragon - with puppy breath -  in the bathroom - I’d go get the weight scale and shoot the reason why I just lied.

Physically - I need - nothing but water for the next couple of weeks.  Oh - and pure sunshine - for the other half of the effort - walking it off.

Okay - so alright - my butt doesn’t really need them.  Fine.  I’ll blame it on my soul.

Yeah - It was my soul.  And my soul thanked me - after having the first five or six!  Oh - wow.  All I could think about after the first one was “ Look out, Godiva!  Yo’ high-dolla munchies just took a serious hit! “

That raspberry chocolate took me elsewhere for a while!  Don’t ask me where.  Trying to concentrate that hard with two canine’s behaving like they’re trying to maul each other - forget it.  But then - there’s something to be said for feeling like I’m in heaven - when I’m actually nowhere but in a fog.

The Bliss chocolates are - actually - nothing new for Hershey.  They come from the old-fashioned recipe - the original recipe.  That was before the days of that sad decision to begin cheating customers - and giving them gritty - whipped - hollow tasting chocolate with less flavor.  Yeah - all the chocolate monsters pulled that stunt - back in the late '60's - when the price of sugar and cocoa climbed high altitudes - the same way coffee is doing right now.

And I’m puttin’ these puppies to the test!

I had one of - those - kind of days - yesterday.  I think the ultimate moment - among several - was the one when I was putting groceries into the trunk of my Putt-Putt.  Got all the bags in.  Started situating everything.  Turned around to get the last two items - the Puppy Chow and the Potty-Pads.  “ What the - where’s the grocery cart! “

My eyes looked down the row of parked cars - instantly soaking in the most ironic sight.  A lady younger than me - racing - trying to strap her baby into a car seat with her eyes planted on - my grocery cart - which was headed right for the side of a car driven by - a lady much older than me - ( yeah - I know!  Can ya' believe it! ).


The younger lady was fighting like the devil - trying to beat the clock!  Trying to get to that run-away cart before it hit the car driven by the older lady!

I should have shot a photo of that!  But my camera was in the glove box of my Putt-Putt.  And -  I discovered - after I managed to get home without hitting any other cars with my car - that I’d left the SD Memory card dangling in my computer tower.

I'm tellin' ya' - it was one of those days!


Poor girl didn’t make it.  But - she won part of the race.  She beat this wench to the cart!  I felt just - horrified - embarrassed - really bad.

If she wasn’t in such a hurry to get back to her baby - understandable, of course - I would have ripped open that bag of Hershey’s Raspberry Bliss right there - and the two of us would have pigged out - right there - in the parking lot at - WalMart!

Okay - that’s my WalMart story for the day!

It's Sunday - Sunday!!

 

- Journaling -

" Even with Trinity living all the way in Texas with her Mommy and Daddy - that STILL couldn’t stop us from being able to send her that very first Tricycle for her second Birthday!  Mommy spent time putting it together for her after it was delivered by UPS - just in time to surprise that Birthday Girl!  She had to stretch to reach with her toes - but that won’t last very long! "

- Kit -

" Serendipity " by Monna Lainson ( No longer available )

- Fonts -

Kristen ITC - Raavi - Eras Light ITC

 

 - Journaling -
" It was so cold this morning.  Temperatures had gone way  beyond below normal.  Dwayne stepped out to our cold kitchen to light the fireplace - but not before putting on his fleece robe and pajamas.  As he stepped into the kitchen  to make coffee - Zucker followed behind.  He sat watching Dwayne making the coffee - as if he had decided to try learning to set up the pot - himself ! "

- Kit -

Lost by Kimberly Stewart at www.scrapbook-elements.com

Header Font - Papyrus

Journaling Font - Nyala ( 18pt. )

I don’t know how I managed to get it done - but - I have finished two more layouts within the past 24 hours.  But I must have hurried myself badly.  I forgot to put dates on these two layouts.

I will print the darn things out and just scribble the dates on the back.  ‘Cuz I am not going through all that hassle with all those files and formats - again!  Once is bad enough.

I think the 4am wake-up schedule helps with being able to get my layouts done.  For one thing - puppies sleep until 7am - whether they want to or not.

LOL  Naw…. They usually do sleep later.

I will say this.  There is a vicious battle going on under the roof of this abode.  Seems two four-legged yard varmints are attempting to demote their masters and hijack their titles of - King and Queen!  And the party around here never stops.

Zucker has - by far - had all his woes knocked and bitten out of him by - his new puppy.

However - in the process - what remains in the ability to hear out of ears belonging to Dwayne and me is being tested to the utmost.  Last night came to an abrupt halt around 7:30pm.  Zucker had to sit with Dwayne.  Carlie had to sit with me.  The lights were dimmed.  And we were - finally - able to drop the decibel level of the television volume by several notches.

( Look very closely...  The little wench has got hold of his cheek! )

There’s something to be said - when you can’t even hear the rude uproars going on in the Canadian Olympic stadium for the Curling matches.

 

( Downright... Vicious ! )

Almost sounds like we’re raising two kids with ADD - huh?!

Carlie has - basically - surpassed Zucker in size.  She’s growing in ways that put a weed to shame.  She eats three times more than Zucker.  She’s about as tall as him.  She may weigh a couple pounds less than him.  But - those baby teeth make up a whole lotta difference.  And I think she’s figured that out!

I’ve had to put Band-Aids loaded with A and D Ointment on a finger and the thumb of my left hand - within the past 72 hours alone.  And all I was doing was - giving her one of her little peanut-butter cookies!

Note to Self ** - Stop using your left  hand to feed the dogs.  You need it more than they do!

Here are more of my efforts I’ve neglected to post here!  And - like usual - there’s a little  sumptin’ sumptin’ - after all that!

 

( This incident happened on September 7, 2009 )
- Kit -
Lost by Kimberly Stewart at www.scrapbook-elements.com

- Fonts -
Edmonds
Fenice BT

** This was a really sad situation for us to watch.  By the way - the so-called Mare caring for the colt was - actually - a full-hanging Stallion!  He was our problem - but not for reasons you may imagine.  We had him in a pie-shaped corner - barely big enough for him to turn his butt around.  Our faces were only inches away from his butt at times - holding all the barricades and rope.  Not once - did he ever - even tick a muscle to prepare for kicking any of us.  The problem was - he had never been trailered.  He was so good-natured.  Somebody got a wonderful horse out of that one.  If our barn had been already relocated and finished - we would have adopted all three animals.

 - Journaling -
" This is the face of a dog when he's got only one thing on his mind... 'Touch my feet one more time and...'  Ohhh, he was so ticked off at me after spending half the day trimming his nails and cleaning up his feet and legs.  But what is one day of him taking his turn - compared to all the days I've had to put up with his feet after they come back from the barn?  I guess he'll just have to get over it! "


- Kit -
Life is Ruff by Digilicious Designs ( Athena Gray ) at Digital Design Den


- Fonts -
Bentley
Coldbringer KG
CongressT

- Kit -

Summer Love by Vickey Morrisey at www.scrapbook-elements.com

What Was I Thinkin' ?

( Hey... check out the little note.. over there -> )

 

- Journaling -

 " Hard to believe Carlie has been with us less than a month - and already as big as Zucker!  Brains comes with the package - and ‘ Big Brother ’ is already teaching her bad habits!  Rather than only one - now we have two that will refuse to let us out the door - for as long as they shall live !! " 

- Journaling Fonts -
Dubiel and CarbonType

- Kit -
Autumn Memories  by Cari Lopez at www.scrapbook-elements.com
 - Title Alpha -
Worn Plaid  by Kimberly Stewart at www.scrapbook-elements.com

Over the past few days - and when I win the fight for a chance to get it done - I’ve been going over a lot of my content filed here at my blog.  And One of the things I’ve noticed is the fact that I’ve been forgetting to post my digital scrapbooking pages here - at my blog - the very reason why I began this thing!

I dunno - blame it on Facebook!  No - blame it on Picasa Web Photos… PhotoBucket… Flickr…  Ohhhhh, crap!  Let’s just sum this up in one sentence.

Blame it on all the resized and various formatted files I have to create every time I do a layout - simply because nobody in that area of the web can seem to get together long enough to put creative minds together and spare us all the agony - because - well - it would just be too simple and easy with only one file size and one file format - for every place on the web!

*deep breath*    -  * Whew! *

Seriously.  I end up creating a minimum of four files with three different file formats.  And there’s this other thing called - Life - that I have to keep up with.  Ya’ know - as a woman - it just seems like - no matter what the subject matter is - I am forever - picking my battles.  And the really crazy thing about that is - I don’t even like to fight!

So - I’ve started with the latest layout that I’ve managed to get put together.  From there - I’ll walk backwards - posting them in the next couple of blogs until I get caught up.

Hey - it’s still winter.  Might as well walk in a warm place!

 

- Journaling -

  " I may not have received this beautiful bouquet of flowers Dwayne
arranged to have delivered to me - if I hadn't gone ahead and checked
our voicemail on the phone.  I called him to be sure, first, before
returning the call.  These days - you can never be too cautious!  How
else was I supposed to know anyone would deliver flowers all the way
out here?  He just laughed! "

- Kit -

XOXO by Kimberly Stewart at www.scrapbook-elements.com
- Title Alpha -
 XOXO Alpha Set by Kimbverly Stewart at www.scrapbook-elements.com
- Additional Elements Used -
"On The Edge Photo Masks - Vol. 8" - by Shelley Rae Cusbert at www.scrapbook-elements.com

"On The Edge Photo Masks - Vol. 10" - by Shelley Rae Cusbert at www.scrapbook-elements.com

"Simple Gifts - Weathered Threads" by Christine Bartholomew at www.scrapbook-elements.com

- Journaling -
" I have wanted this thing gone for over a year now.
And Judd was supposed to come buy it and pick it up...
months ago !!


But Judd likes fishin' too much.  And he never got around to it.
But I guess Judd had more "mountain sense" than we have.
He knew we'd probably need it more than him - until we got our
wood-burning stove installed.


Judd was so right !! As much as I despise this thing...
25* for the high today and 13* for tonight is just cold enough
that even I will bend!  And this next week looks worse! "

- Kit -

Cold Hands Warm Heart by Kimberly Stewart at www.scrapbook-elements.com

- Font -

Kristen ITC

 

- Journaling -

"October 30, 2009 - We missed our annual trip to Cades Cove in the Great Smoky Mountains to photograph all the beautiful 'Fall Color' that returns each year.  Instead - We count our blessings and feel thankful for all the 'Colorful Show' that arrived all around our home!"

 - Multiple Kits Used -
Kimberly’s UBI Abundant Fall Element Pack 3 by Kimberly Stewart at www.scrapbook-elements.com

Kimberly’s UBI Abundant Fall Paper Pack 1 by Kimberly Stewart

Autumn Blessings by Kimberly Stewart

Photo Frame - Divergent Frames Pack by Cathy Bretz

Alpha - Worn Plaid by Kimberly Stewart

Fonts -

Rockwell - Pristina

 

- Journaling -

" God help me.  But I despise winter.  And I'm not alone.

Our wonderful - lovable - lover of life - Zucker. "

" I never knew exactly how much I was dreading the oncoming winter season - until I had the moment of this vision.  Oh, how he loves to run.  How he loves to be outside for hours - and hours.  Becoming absolutely filthy - lathering with sweat - drinking up the water as long as somebody will fill the bowl - smelling worse than a dirty sock.  Every bit of it puts him in his glory of happiness. "

" It's as if he has come to recognize when the days of bitter coldness are approaching.  And one can't help wondering what he's thinking as he sits and stares out the window - watching the leaves begin to turn color and fall. "

- Kit -
Autumn Country Dream by Cari Lopez at www.scrapbook-elements.com
- Word Art -
Abundant Harvest (U.B.I. Oct.-2009) by Mikki Livanos at www.scrapbook-elements.com
- Journaling Font -
Dubiel (Bold)

 

- Journaling -
" Dwayne and I decided to go ahead and pull this watermelon from my patch.  The stem wasn't quite finished turning brown.  But we were afraid to leave it out any longer. "


" Good thing we made that decision!  It was ready! "


 "So was another melon that we left out there for the time being.  That one split open by itself - on the vine - only two days later. "

- Photo caption reads -
" This melon weighed 44 lbs.!  We ended up taking over half of it down to our neighbors.  We sent one home with Dwayne's Mom and Stepdad.  That melon weighed 58 lbs.!  We sent another home with Charlotte and Wayne Greene.  But we forgot to weigh that one. "

- Kit -
Gardening by Kimberly Stewart at www.scrapbook-elements.com
- Font -
Garamound

Let this posting be a lesson to others.  It may look like I’ve been doing nothing.  But let me assure you - as you can see by photos plastered here - I have been fairly busy!

The funny part about all these pages - you should see the size of the files holding all the photos waiting in line!

Me Time on Metropolis

The Daddy of this house babysat the kids - while the Mama of this house took some very much needed “ Me Time “ yesterday.  Yes!  It was a day at - Turkey Creek!  Just me 'n my Putt-Putt!  Woohoo!

Getting these opportunities - very rare for me.  And yesterday became - bottom line - pure necessity - for the sake of the last thread of sanity my soul possesses right now.

And yesterday unfolded as a day that almost gave me a challenge from the get-go.  In fact - first thought was to turn around and go back home.  Second thought was about how long it’s been since I’ve been turned out of my pen - all alone - to go run- and be totally free - for a few hours.

Truth be told - Me and my Putt-Putt always take the back roads.  I mean - the girl is showing her age.  And - I respect my elders.  I’m afraid all the excitement on the freeways just might be enough to kill the old fart.  Ya’ know?

Little does she know this, but - I’m ridin’ her all the way - to her own funeral.

Yeah - I know.  I’m goin’ ta’ Hell. 

We made it all the way to the dividing line between Loudon and Lenoir City - just before they make you hit your brakes and switch to a measly 30mph through the old main drag - so you can get a really good look at all the dilapidated houses run down by renters - and slum lords who only care that they get their rent money.

The only thing that keeps the area from being considered skid row is the fact that the county has been dry forever! ( For all you 20-somethings and such - that means no booze sold in the county. )  But there‘s a flood comin‘, y‘all.  They voted the booze in - kids.  And all the Grammaw’s living in the county are justa spittin’ about that!

Huh?  Oh - yeah.  Anyway - we reached that point and were blocked by a really nasty crash.  It was such a mangled mess that I couldn’t count how many vehicles were involved.  And in the middle was - no surprise - a bobtail tanker truck.  The tanker looked like it was spared - even though it sat catty-wonked across lanes going in both directions.  But the cab - looked like somebody slammed head-on into the face of the poor thing.  It was crushed - wheels twisted and bent in half.  Tires blown - of course.  As far as I could count - four ambulances.  There were two cars involved - that I could see - on my side of the crash.  And it looked like there could have been one or two more on the other side.  Just lights and chaos - everywhere.  And I could only stare up at the gray interior upholstery on the top of my Putt-Putt - and pray - pray that nobody was seriously hurt - or even worse.

Do we go - or go home?

Fortunately - there was a horse-shoe driveway of a closed down business - just before the accident.  Us girls ( my Putt-Putt and me ) had to park there for a moment and discuss the situation to find a compromise!

And that’s when it was okay to get on my cell phone.  ’Cuz I don’t talk on my cell phone when I’m driving my vehicles.  And - I don’t even need to take the Oprah Pledge.  I’m an individual - with brains - and common sense - not a sheep. 

I called Dwayne - for just a tad bit of advice - ‘cuz I really don’t know my way around all these other roads in this area.  And - there’s an unspoken rule in this region.  You don’t travel down a lot of the dirt roads in this area - unless you’re invited.  ;)  Hey - Popcorn Sutton wasn’t the only Moon-shiner in the country.  And if you think all that ended after they gave up Prohibition - you need more schoolin’!

I ended up going back to a road that led me to I-75 and followed through with my part of the deal in the compromise.  My Putt-Putt and me drove 65mph to the Lenoir City exit - cruised the main drag ( Hwy. 321 )  at 40mph down to catch Hwy. 11 from there - and headed on to Turkey Creek.

That short flight down I-75 was a real work-out for my Putt-Putt!  But she seemed to feel like she had a little more energy after that little run.  I was tickled!

Turkey Creek is usually identified - in short form for those not living around this region - as being located in Knoxville.  Truth be told - the proper location would be Farragut.  But ask any woman around here.  We really don’t care.  We’re just more than happy to enjoy this God-given miracle!

And for a ‘Countrified Rural Convert’ like me - it’s like seeing angels with trumpets drop out of the sky!  It’s like - landing on the planet of Metropolis!  You name it.  They thought of it.  They built it.  And they’re just getting started!  Ten times better than driving through - even the largest - neighborhoods insanely decorated for Christmas!

You can’t love civilization enough - until you move away from everything!

And it can be a problem for Libra women like me.  “ I can’t decide.  I can’t make up my mind!  Don’t make me choose - please! “  And then you get home and - “ Oh, crap!  I forgot that I wanted to go to Cook’s Corner! “  - or one of the other millionth fantastic stores in that secret garden!  No - not Olive Garden.  I said - secret garden.  But they do have one - of course.  And of course - I don’t go there.  Ohhhhh…. No.   Nope.  I go to Johhny Carino’s!

But - I didn’t go to Johnny Carino’s yesterday.  I leave that adventure to my husband - to spring on me for a surprise!  No - I went Stir-Fry - instead!  Dwayne doesn’t like oriental food.  “ You’re stuffed in no time at all.  But you’re hungry - again - an hour later! “

Yeah - “ Me Time “ days mean getting to go out and eat the kind of food my husband never wants to eat!  And putting my blinders on.  “ Cuz - there’s so much fun - and so little time! "  I have to be choosy.  So - my eyes only land on racks and shelves with signs screaming “On Sale!” - or - “Clearance!”

And ohhhhhh, boy….  Did I get lucky yesterday!

Moral of the story - " Never leave home without your camera. "

Dream Big

There is the purest quality of condensed chaos existing in this household.  It erupts -almost like clockwork - every single day - come the slightest bit of daylight through the bathroom window blinds.

And it almost pushes buttons far enough to entice sharing space in the coffee cup with a shot of Kahlua.

The potty-training phase of bringing home a new puppy is consuming most of my life at the moment.  Man alive - this girl is no different than taking on three Zuckers!  She doesn’t just bring challenges.  She brings a battle - Battle of the Nerves!  Battle of the Use of Paper Towels!  Battle of the Stock of Mr. Clean!

She’s even brought a Battle of the Nerves for the washing machine!

Just heard our local weather guy inform us that we’re sitting at about 20* below normal temperatures for this time of year.

I believe him.  I have every reason to believe him.

Here are two photos taken yesterday - of two entirely different icicles.

 

Can you find anything common between the two of them.  Okay - besides frozen water - Goofus!  Actually - they have one other thing in common - like - being long and thick enough to do some real damage on any unwelcomed guest - without a single bullet being necessary!

Dwayne said that - not me.  " Think about it - no evidence left behind! "  Sometimes - I worry.  Should I worry about me - or him?


Notice how they’re curved?  That was artwork - so says all the southwest wind that came our way.  It passed through all day long - like some train holding everybody up at a crossing for a half-hour!  Fortunately - it was passing through with enough speed to make it impossible for all the snow to land around our place!

I’ve been so busy with all the Battles of…. - enough that the task of ordering seed for our garden has been set aside - among a few other items on that neverending list.  But - I’ve made a decision.  I’ll go ahead and order the seed.  Maybe that will jinx all the cold weather!

Well - I can wish - can’t I ?

Loving My Mom

Today is Valentine’s Day!

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Instead of doing the normal kind of journaling about things going on around here at the house - and such - I thought this would be a great place to - spend some time with my thoughts - and get some of them down with pen onto paper.

Well - okay…. With keyboard - onto my blog - to one of the two main authority figures in my life.  Umm - that would be my mother and my husband - respectively ( the egg came before the chicken - from God to Earth - yada yada ) in order.

For the sake of marital bliss - I’ll keep my thoughts for my husband for a private setting between the two of us - after he gets home from work - of course.

But as for my mother - well - I don’t have to fall asleep in the same bed with her.  No worries there - about laying my head on my pillow for the last time!  ;)  Here goes!!

My mother drives me nuts.

And - I would have a photo of her sitting right here.  But - apparently - she hasn’t had anyone take any photos of her with that camera we got her for Christmas.  I dunno.  Not sure.  I can only assume - because she hasn’t sent any photos to us - yet!

But I love her for one reason that comes out of that statement - like a golden egg dropped by some chicken in her nest.  ( And if you can’t figure out how that happens - just  - keep up with the tour guide - alright, already? )

It seems - according to my therapist - I’m never truly happy - unless - I have someone driving me nuts.

No - I’m just kidding.  Oh - get over it - you cranky sacks!  Hey - you!  Time for a Beer Run!  Just - go - NOW.  Yeah - I know it’s Sunday.  You can stand outside the door there and wait until 12noon!  Just - GO!

Actually - my mother drives me nuts because she’s got herself directly in the thick of all that I tried warning her and my father about - for about three years - while I was busting the butt of my heart trying to convince the two of them to move to East Tennessee.  And just the thought of popping off with one of those “ I told you so… “ moments gives me a headache.  Here’s a secret - but don’t tell anybody!  That never accomplishes rewinding the movie of life.  And if anything about it makes me most angry - it’s that fact.  But - oh, boy - if only I could rewind that one!

Still - I learn to be grateful for what I do have - rather than complain any longer - about what I could have had.

I’m grateful for telephones.

At the least - I can talk with my mother almost everyday.  Not that I enjoy the addition to my gray hair - compliments of the challenges she has given me with trying to instruct her about computer functions - finger-pecking with one hand on my own keyboard to keep myself in check with correct directions - while holding a phone in my ear with the other hand.  Maybe that’s how I broke the other keyboard.  “ Nooooo, Mother!  Mom - Mom - Mom - MOM - MOTHER - LISTEN TO ME! ”  ( peck - peck - peck - PECK - PECK - BANG - BANG! )

We’re told that we gain wisdom with age.  Honestly - I refuse to believe my mother is an idiot.  Quite the contrary - I think she chooses to dish out pure entertainment.  Actually - at times - I think she comes around to grab some for herself !  ( “ Dance, Monkey!  Dance! “ )  And all I can say to that is - “ Just wait until ya’ get ta’ Hell, Mother!  You’ll have plenty of time to sit there - shakin’ in your boots over all the paranoid thoughts before I get there!  That’s when I’ll get another turn!  Ha!  And you think you drive me nuts!  “

I can just see my father standing in eyesight - looking off into the distance and yelling as loud as possible!  “ Oh, God!  C’mon… Burn me!  Burn me!  Just get it over with!  Please! “  My father constantly had conversations with God while he was with us - on Earth.  If I remember only one thing most about him - everything usually started coming out of his mouth with " Oh, God! "  first!

Either way ya’ cut life while you’re living it - there are souls protected from ever losing your love - no matter what.  And Mom - you would be one of those souls in my life.  As much as I’d love to - just - wring your neck out - on occasion…

NOTHING can stop me from loving you.  That’s just the way it goes!

I won’t go into all the nice things.  There are too many.  And I’d never get this blog posted.  And neither of us would be able to finish reading it.  But I will give you a HUGE hint in one sentence.  Okay - two sentences - or - something like sentences.

You know all the loving things you’ve done for me as a mother.  Me, too!

Happy Valentine’s Day, Mom!

I Love You!

“Muuuaaaaaahhhh!”
{Hugs!}

Love Always,

The First Brat

Cold - White - and a Real Reason

Ohhhhhh, this winter - and all this - cold weather and - snow.  She just couldn’t take it!  She took the kids and left.  Now my icicle has nobody but - two new roommates.

 And you should just come see what they’ve done to the back porch!  I swear!  Happens every time a woman leaves a man.  He shrivels up and digresses back into the mindset of - swine!

Actually - I must retract that definition.  Why - it’s a known fact among biologists.  Pigs can be quite a bit cleaner than many other beasts of burden.  Even the two-legged kind.

I would think this world should consider - the Fly - to be a more suitable definition.  Take some time.  Just - think about it.

We seem to be having a winter this year with very few days that don’t carry scenery having snow for a main topic.  The ground is frozen.  The grasses even crack into pieces when stepped upon.

The conifers seem to just - know.  They’re sleeping in this year - much later than usual.

Our poor little apple tree.  She hung in there - with pretty green leaves - all the way into December and past Christmas Day.  And then - that one little storm came through - and dumped almost six inches of white powder all around us.

 There do seem to be more birds hanging around this winter.  Of course - my consistent commitment to keeping the bird feeders full may have something to do with that decision.

The Peach tree - oh, that poor girl.  She needs to be pruned.  But it’s just not safe - yet.  With all this snow traveling through in waves - best to wait a while longer.

Even after the season for snow - we tend to get that very last freeze that comes sneaking up - with murder on its mind.  Tries very diligently with a vengeance - in  wild efforts to destroy gorgeous blossoms on the spring bulbs - the azaleas - the flowering trees - those first rose buds.

I have one little question at this time.  Where in the world is - Al Gore?  It appears as if he is bedded down - same as all other - snakes.  Yes - I think he’s laying low to avoid confrontation about the amazing - chill - taking place on this northern side of the hemisphere.  There are no answers for all the questions that would refuse to fill his - bank account - if he were forced to make efforts in finding such!  Oh, no!  This is - by far - not a very good PR time for his campaign of panic!

But - that’s okay - Al!  You just keep hidin’ from the world - all you want!

We’ll all just stand out here for a while longer - enjoying some real snow - while knowing just exactly what and who - really is - responsible for all things natural!  ;)

Talking ’bout The One that brings beauty to truth - no matter how many layers we have to put on to enjoy the sight!

Wrapped Around That Finger

 

Dwayne couldn’t resist shooting some blackmail photos of Carlie on Wednesday evening.  You know - for later - when the boys show up.  Of course - he hasn’t snapped to the fact that the boys will be no problem - come March.  ;)

The puppy sleeps in the strangest positions!  And she's already out-growing her own bed.  So - she invades Zucker's bed.  And he just let's her.  Cuz' he's a man - who's already been trained by a woman.

Wednesday was a big day for all four of us.  It was the first family trip to the Veterinarian.  It was snowing - of course.  It turned out to be a day we would discover that the “ second time’s a rude awakening “ scenario does not only occur with human babies!

 

 

I’m spending so much time looking back - comparing notes.  Zucker was such a wonderful puppy!

By the time we made it back home - my hands would have made anyone think I’d volunteered to bring some feral cat in for rabies shots and a spay.  Basset puppies are blessed with one heck of a snout full of a shark’s bite.  And - they use it.  Carlie did not mind the Nemex so much.  That seemed to taste pretty good - actually!  The Bordetella drops up her nose brought on a bunch of sneezing - which impressed her none in the least.  Flushing the ears with the Trizedta tickled her to the point of setting off some - really fancy - ear flapping!

But - the ultimate pisser was - the 8 in 1 vaccine.  She was done - ready to go home!  Do not speak to her or else done!  We had to take a break before giving her one last - “ Oh, My God! “  That was the Neo/Dex eye drops.  That’s where my hands took the hickie for her professed infliction of cruelty.

Dogs can fool you in more ways than you think.  You discover that by the time you stop by the Reception Desk of a Vet’s office - while on your way out.  If only - we could just keep on walking - right out the door!  I expected the tab to be somewhere around $175.00.  Yeah - right.  Both dogs managed to come out with $346.00 worth of revenge!

Walk in thinking I have perfectly healthy doggies.  Walk out discovering I have become a Vet’s Assistant - with my own pharmacy!

What have I learned?  Never buy another puppy from any breeder unless - they insist on birthing and raising litters inside their own homes - not outside near some barn.  Carlie has started out her relationship with her Vet on a rough turf.  But the eyes and ears of a Basset Hound are only two of many issues.  To be honest - I got lucky.

By the time the doggies had supper - Carlie was continuing an attitude towards me of -  “ Don’t even look at me, Wench! “

 

It was time to show her who really is the Boss!  I yanked her up for one of my funtime follies of - “ I can fly! “  Every Basset Hound has to go through this.  Their ears were made just for all this fun!  Okay... human fun!

Needless to say - she was not the slightest bit impressed.

In fact - the 14.6 lb. three-month-old yard varmint ( I did get one weapon out of the visit! ) went running to her Daddy!

 

*Sniff… Sniff…*    “ Daddy - Mommy’s bee-un mean at’ me! “  See the tear running down her eye?  Yeah - right.  What a Drama Queen!

 

“ See… at least my Daddy loves me! “

 

“ Is he really buying all this? “

 

“ I win! HAHAHAHAHAHA ! “